Post by Nemesi on Jun 20, 2003 6:45:05 GMT -5
It's been a long time, but here is the fourth of mu diaries. Enjoy! Sorr it took so long Jade!
Kung Lao’s Diary:
You know my life has been absolutely fucked up! I’ve had my ass whupped as much as I’ve whupped ass! And you know what? It sucks! Big time! I’m a top fighter, I kick ass for a living, because it’s fun! My enemies fear me. That’s how hard I am!
Although my losses are not because I am a crap fighter! Thinks of Johnny* I’m one of the best, don’t forget, but a warrior is only as good as the tools he uses, so they say! The reason I lose is because of *quickly make sure there is no one around* my hat! Yes, my hat!
There was this one time, when I was about to kill this opponent. I threw my hat, you know, like I do and it just stopped! I was like move you stupid ass hat! But it didn’t move! Move you fucking dopey hat, I shouted and then it did! Towards me! I was like, run motherfucker, run! There was no way I was gonna get hit by that thing! You should have seen me, would have been made Olympic champion. See I’m good at everything. I was running, screaming for ages until Raiden came and saved me! Although how he had time to do so, since his dick is shoved so far up Liu Kang’s ass for all hours of the day, is beyond me! Probably had some sort of surgery to remove it!
There was this other time, when my hat actually hit the target in the head. Only when I went to take it out, it was stuck! The thickheaded wanker had got my hat stuck in his thick skull! I was pissed of then! I was dancing around in rage because I couldn’t remove the hat. This was how I learned my whirlwind Fatality. I was moving so fast I began sucking in air. Fujin was so jealous! You should’ve seen the look on his face. He’s so long-winded. Wouldn’t shut the fuck up about it for ages.
That Fatality got me into trouble though. I was doing it shortly after learning it. And guess what?! I ended up sucking in a metal pipe. I was knocked the fuck out and because of all this, I went to find Master Bo’ Rai Cho!
What a fat ass! He looked like a pregnant woman! No offence to the ladies but he was just FAT! The thought just kept entering my head every two seconds! You have no idea how hard it was to laugh! Especially when he farted. Although you have no idea how it smelt either. Or how loud the drunken bastard does them! Let me tell ya, it’s hard trying not to laugh and choke at the same time! I almost died! The scruffy bastard vomited on me once as well! I was not impressed! He thought it was funny, until I whirlwind kicked his FAT ass! *laughs*
But I’m back and more kick ass than ever before. I think I’ll take Kitana from Liu. I remember before, he came up to me and told me to stay away from his girl. I asked the scrawny little woman that he is what he was gonna do about it! Would you believe he said he’s kick my ass! Has anyone heard him scream! That is a boy in need of some balls!!
But anyway, that’s enough about me. I’ll catch you all later. Got some ass kicking to do!
Bye!
Kung Lao’s Diary:
You know my life has been absolutely fucked up! I’ve had my ass whupped as much as I’ve whupped ass! And you know what? It sucks! Big time! I’m a top fighter, I kick ass for a living, because it’s fun! My enemies fear me. That’s how hard I am!
Although my losses are not because I am a crap fighter! Thinks of Johnny* I’m one of the best, don’t forget, but a warrior is only as good as the tools he uses, so they say! The reason I lose is because of *quickly make sure there is no one around* my hat! Yes, my hat!
There was this one time, when I was about to kill this opponent. I threw my hat, you know, like I do and it just stopped! I was like move you stupid ass hat! But it didn’t move! Move you fucking dopey hat, I shouted and then it did! Towards me! I was like, run motherfucker, run! There was no way I was gonna get hit by that thing! You should have seen me, would have been made Olympic champion. See I’m good at everything. I was running, screaming for ages until Raiden came and saved me! Although how he had time to do so, since his dick is shoved so far up Liu Kang’s ass for all hours of the day, is beyond me! Probably had some sort of surgery to remove it!
There was this other time, when my hat actually hit the target in the head. Only when I went to take it out, it was stuck! The thickheaded wanker had got my hat stuck in his thick skull! I was pissed of then! I was dancing around in rage because I couldn’t remove the hat. This was how I learned my whirlwind Fatality. I was moving so fast I began sucking in air. Fujin was so jealous! You should’ve seen the look on his face. He’s so long-winded. Wouldn’t shut the fuck up about it for ages.
That Fatality got me into trouble though. I was doing it shortly after learning it. And guess what?! I ended up sucking in a metal pipe. I was knocked the fuck out and because of all this, I went to find Master Bo’ Rai Cho!
What a fat ass! He looked like a pregnant woman! No offence to the ladies but he was just FAT! The thought just kept entering my head every two seconds! You have no idea how hard it was to laugh! Especially when he farted. Although you have no idea how it smelt either. Or how loud the drunken bastard does them! Let me tell ya, it’s hard trying not to laugh and choke at the same time! I almost died! The scruffy bastard vomited on me once as well! I was not impressed! He thought it was funny, until I whirlwind kicked his FAT ass! *laughs*
But I’m back and more kick ass than ever before. I think I’ll take Kitana from Liu. I remember before, he came up to me and told me to stay away from his girl. I asked the scrawny little woman that he is what he was gonna do about it! Would you believe he said he’s kick my ass! Has anyone heard him scream! That is a boy in need of some balls!!
But anyway, that’s enough about me. I’ll catch you all later. Got some ass kicking to do!
Bye!
